ONCE THERE IS SILENCE WORDS WILL COME

I must have been guided to attend this special ‘writers workshop’ today. Without knowing what to expect I silently joined a group of other aspiring writers. After all I always wrote just without preparation or any instruction. Never did I know what is taught at writers workshops. Today I was to find out for myself.

The first subtle feeling that I won’t know what to write was overcome by excitement and flow as soon as we were given the first instructions and my pen hit the paper. After hour and half of intermittent writing and then reading it out loud for others in the group to hear, I went away feeling uplifted and encouraged by my progress.

Never before I wrote impromptu and read it out loud to a group of strangers. Well, there is always opportunity to learn something new and challenge our current comfort zone feelings.

Now, you might not think much of it, but for me it was a day of small breakthroughs.

These may seem insignificant wins to you, yet they mean a lot to me. Not only I went there on my own initiative and by myself, drove the car to the other side of town and found a parking spot on a street in a parallel parking space (which I never do on my own). I also found out I could easily find something to write to each given exercise.

They were a bit harder than if one just writes what comes to mind. We were given instructions and restrictions, to make it more interesting and challenging.

So to give you a taste of what I wrote, here is one 7 min piece (that’s how long we had) that we were instructed to write, with some words restrictions.
This came out of me on paper 🙂

It could be called: “WHAT HAPPENS AFTER YOU MEDITATE”

“What happens when it’s quiet in the mind is the most amazing of situations.
The mind sort of dissolves into the never never land and
With each thought disappearing quietness screams so loudly
It takes over the whole space
That was previously filled with chatter and fear.

There is now only nothingness in the fullness of the empty space.
Given that the heart is still beating, one achieves perfect state of bliss and well-being.
Mind no longer contains itself and expands into the outer space.
The world changes as a reflection of this experience.
Nothing creates more space for love and connection.”

Do you feel good after reading it? I certainly hope so, as I did when I reread it. 🙂
The outcome of the workshop was achieved!

I surely feel more keen for more writing workshops and also inspired for more to write.
Wait, there is more coming soon…

PS. If you have any personal experience with workshop for writers, or the above text inspired something within you, I would love to hear it in the comments.

Words from silence…

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ALL RELATIONSHIP ISSUES SOLVED!

When it comes to relationships, there are many in our lives. There are many people in different relationships to us. Some people are in relationship with us and we call them family. Others we have a different type of relationship with and call them friends.

Another kind of relationship we might have with someone in a position of authority. Perhaps a doctor, coach, landlady, or teacher. Whatever the reason we are interacting with another person on a regular basis, we tend to enter into some form of a relationship with them.

The best thing about relationships is, as many of you might have realized, that they are usually involving two and more people. Yet, we also have some kind of a relationship with ourselves.

What I want to discuss with you today, is how we are handling these interactions with other people. Whether with family, friends, or others in our life.

I will give you an example here.

Here we have Betty and her partner of many years, Don. Betty loves Don and Don loves Betty. Let’s start with Betty.

Betty has been feeling a  bit frustrated lately. When we examine it closer, the reason Betty is not happy is because Don doesn’t pay much attention to Betty. At least not as much as he used to.  Don, who is at work the whole day, is fairly happy just to crash on the couch, watch some TV, have a beer and go to sleep.

Betty tries to talk to Don, but as she is not getting the kind of interaction that she would be pleased with, she soon stops her attempts to start the talk. As a result, she starts to look for another way to feel better and to fill the void. Betty finds herself a solution. She goes to shops and buys designers clothing.

When Betty shows Don her newly bought treasures, at least there she generates some form of interaction between her and Don. It might also mean, that Don will have to look at her in her bright new outfit, and might even compliment her.

From the above scenario, we can see that Betty is finding another way of getting to feel better. However, avoiding the real issue.

Now, here is Don.

Don doesn’t usually tend to express much, in terms of feelings and emotions. He doesn’t tend to talk much with Betty, as he doesn’t think she can understand him. Don is sometimes upset that Betty does things without his consent, but he doesn’t talk about it much.

Don thinks life is a struggle and one has to build up resilience and overcome the struggle by being virtuous. So he tries his best to live a virtuous existence. At times, Don’s internal pressure valve bursts open and the steam comes out with others around him.

Look at Betty and Don. Are you able to perhaps see anyone you know in this example?

Now let me tell you how I see this scenario from the external viewpoint. And what would serve best both Betty and Don.

Betty and Don had become a bit intertwined with each other over the years. And truly, that happens to many of us, when we live with someone long enough.

At the beginning, we spoke about the different reasons we all enter into relationships. The partnership relationship is one that many of us, or at least some of us, will go through in this life.

We learn very young how relationships are, by observing people around us. Then when we are growing up, we learn from other sources like media. The mixture of these is indeed a big influence on how we form and handle our own relationships.

Have you ever heard yourself say something to another, and then realized that you just sounded like one of your parents or carer?

So how to best deal with conflicts and issues underlying the often overlooked problems, before they snowball into a bigger problem in our relationship?

The best way about building lasting and fulfilling relationship is to start with oneself. When we are still single and at the stage when we dream about the other half. That is the time we need to start building a strong relationship with oneself.

What does that look like?

When we learn to understand, that the reason we would like to be in a relationship is for the beautiful shared moments of peace and harmony, of joy and content with life, of excitement from living and sharing this existence with another being. Then the person of such a confidence with life, is ready to attract their match.

On the other hand, when we come to partnership relationship from needs and expectations on the other person, we don’t come from a place of wholeness and love. Then the other person we attract to ourselves is also in the same boat. They are responding to the energetic vibration we are sending (we could call it a certain degree of low self-confidence, lack of self-love and desire for any kind of personal attachment).

The true solution to Betty and Don is to go back to their own basic needs and fulfill them with self-love. They, and we all, can be sure to do ourselves a big favor, when we come back and start the journey within.

And if that all sounds too airy fairy, then perhaps just have a power session at the gym and couple of green smoothies, before delving into the unknown field of self exploration and self-help.

I wish you the best new self discoveries. As we all can benefit from some more meditation, internal observing, reflection and self-awareness.

Live well aware.

 

 

 

 

journey to my heart

The Journey Back To My Heart

Imagine the day has come when you are finally surrounded by everything you ever wanted. You own all the luxuries and gadgets you so long dreamed about.

Now you look at it all and ask yourself: What is the one most treasured item in my possession? And once you locate that item in your life, ask yourself another question: Is it within the power of the item to bring me the ultimate happiness? Or will it provide only a transient feeling of temporary elation?

The teachers out there teach that gratitude and still more gratitude is the new-found key to personal fulfillment and more satisfying experiences and things.

And with that another question surfaced to my mind.

Is more ‘material stuff’ ever going to satisfy our deep human needs?

There is, inside me, a subtle flame, a feeling, a sense, that this is all transient and surface level happiness. The real ‘stuff’, the true joy in life, is elsewhere.

All things that we collect and surround ourselves with, might have a practical application, a reason for being. Whether it be a tool, a vehicle, a shelter, a piece of clothing, a food, a drink etc. All of it provides a desired function. And from that function, we are rewarded with feelings of comfort, and what perhaps could even be called well-being.

Yet, unless we also feel personal connection, a feeling of acceptance and feeling of self-worth plus more of similar feelings; despite all the ‘material stuff’ there is still an emptiness inside of us.

How do we then navigate from the overstimulated desire ‘to have’ to our more subtle desire of being whole?

So how to start the journey to our heart’s true fulfilled desires?

Let’s see if I have the correct strategic answers to that…

The Fulfillment Strategy

1) Let’s start by appreciating the whole journey called life. The miracle of life is very underrated by us all. Unless we step out of our individual perspective and come to see life from a broader perspective of planets, universes and energy, we might not realize the opportunity we have been given, by being alive here and now.

2) Next, let’s start by accepting ourselves the way we are now….with any perceived flaws and imperfections we might think about at times. And without the need to compare ourselves to anyone else, even us, in the past ! (yes, that’s truly hard, I know!)

3) What you might find helpful, is this practice. Once a week, find a quiet spot, sit for a few minutes just by yourself and do simple breathing exercises. Close your eyes and put your focus on your breath. Appreciate life force for each breath you are graciously receiving. And let go of any tensions you might have accumulated in your body.

When I have some discomfort, I focus my attention on my breath. And I try to let my thoughts slide inside without grabbing them by their horns.

Once we have come to the center of our being, life seems to flow through us.

So, what do I see as the key to my living happiness and joy?

Coming home to my true self, being unique and authentic in being ‘me’ with all that comes with that package.

Relaxing in the knowing that all is transient, even unwanted undesirable feelings or worries.

As you surely would know, our past colors our present, yet might not determine our future.

All shall pass. So, with that, enjoy each breath while it’s still FREE!

Breath freely!