Have you been wondering what a key for success is?
Did you ever think “When I get xy …It will make me happy?”
Whether we look at our activities, our relationships, our finances or our personal achievement there is one common denominator.
We first need to define what we consider to be SUCCESS and even what does HAPPY mean to us. My personal definition of success is not so much what I GET, but rather who I AM and more still WHO I BECOME in the process of doing something. The becoming is the most important part. And what does happy mean? Happiness for me is e.g. a leisurely walk on the beach, in a great company. The fresh sea air, pleasant water temperature and no jellyfish or stone-fish in sight.
I would like to point out some common misconceptions relating to mistakes we can make about our striving for success and happiness.
AVOID COMMON MISTAKES
Often times we happen to get our eyes on an object (be it a material item of any kind, or a person) and we then start to feel that we will only be successful/happy if we achieve the acquisition of this object.
Now let me share something with you. What I understood from the variety of teachings from personal development, spirituality, therapy and healing modalities that I have researched over the years…is this.
There is NOT a material thing, nor a person out there, who would bring us the never ending happiness and forever lasting success.
Please understand. There are many people who cross our life paths, some of whom we might believe can make us forever happy. And many items, that we cherish and value and which can be useful and even just pleasant to have. However, what I am talking about is the feeling of success and happiness that are NEVER ENDING = LASTING. Is that possible at all?
I will give you an example.
Say you finally found the person you fall in love with. You are both in love with each other and feel at the top of the world. When one day later on, in the life of you two, there comes difference of opinions about something that may seem rather fundamental. Is your love strong enough to withstand the difference of ideas and opinions? Or are your mental observations so important that you would rather trow in the towel into the ring of the relationship?
At that time, where is the level of your happiness and success that you so very much felt at the beginning of the relationship?
Here is another illustrative example:
For a very long time you dream about having something. Let’s say it’s a certain car. You have been putting it out there into the Universe, asking to be the new owner of that car. You dream about having this car and how happy you would be when you own that car. Then the day actually comes, when you do have the opportunity to get this car. You are over the moon and so happy that you realized that dream. You want to share your happiness with everyone.
However, the happiness doesn’t last forever. After a while the so new attributes of this car become everyday use and even ordinary. You start to crave something new, which now seems to be just the perfect thing to make you happy… Can you start to see the pattern?
Even if you believe that this is the final missing part, it never is that way!
WHAT IS THE SECRET DOOR TO HAPPINESS AND SUCCESS?
Is there such a ‘thing’ as never ending happiness and ever-lasting success?
You may have answered ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ to the above question. I would like to suggest that there indeed is a way.
What I would suggest is that we start from within. Before we set our eyes on something ‘that would surely make us happy’, we first find the best possible feeling of happiness inside. Let’s start from the point of being happy, and then look at things with fresh perspective. Not as something we NEED to get in life to BECOME happy or a success.
In case that you are struggling with the idea of being happy in the first place, try this out.
THE HAPPINESS INDULGENCE
Sit in a quiet place, or put on a meditative music or a calm piano music and close your eyes.
Think back to the time when you were really happy… First event like that that comes to mind.
In your memories, return to the place where you were back then and think about what was happening at the time around you.
Recall as much detail as possible. What were you doing, was anyone else there, what was the weather like, what environment was surrounding you.
How do you feel?
Now, in this moment, you might be very close to feeling the same feeling like back then…and if so, the same chemical reaction is happening in your body.
This happiness evoking is what we might call ‘The Happiness Indulgence’.
Do this exercise as often as you like. You might start to feel better straight away, or perhaps after the second time you try this. That is all fine. Give it a go and be happy as often as you can recall.
And if you still seek the never ending success and ever-lasting happiness, start with the above exercise. After you already FEEL HAPPY consider it to be the one great success to start with.
From an empowered and uplifted mind, life will be easier.